The Return to the time before and distortion confusion
This concept of The Return came to me early in my awakening journey. One of my first paintings was of a beautiful, goddess-like woman, whom I later recognized as The Divine Mother. In a deep flow state, I instinctively painted her with a pregnant belly, then added the Flower of Life. From that moment, the vision took on a life of its own—painting after painting emerged, each one flowing effortlessly into existence.
When I painted the baby in the blue spiral, I knew I was bringing something through—something meant for this time. I shared the paintings, posted videos, and put them out into the world, feeling an urgency to express and share. Only later did I realize that this was more than just an artistic expression; it was a calling. A call sent out into the ethers, seeking those who would join me in earth work. And sure enough, the right person appeared—one who had already seen the blue baby.
The Return…to what? Innocence, Oneness, grace, love, unity consciousness…ultimately to return to the formless of the Absolute. In 2020 I exhibited three of the paintings in the San Francisco Women’s Art Gallery. It was a weird time but good to see the paintings hanging.
This journey continues to expand, revealing itself to me layer by layer. I know now that The Return is something I will continue to develop—perhaps as a deck, a book, or something yet to be fully realized. It speaks to the profound process of birthing ourselves anew, like a balloon expanding within balloons, consciousness unfolding within the cosmic womb. It is not a return to a place, but a return to a state of Divine Beingness.
Why it feels so important!
Many Lightworkers have experienced the profound sensation of being ‘pregnant’ with their own rebirth—an initiation into a new state of being. This is not a physical pregnancy but a sacred process of transformation, where the old self dissolves and the new self emerges, luminous and whole. It can feel as though one is birthing not only themselves but an entirely new reality—the New Earth—a world aligned with higher consciousness, love, and unity. This phenomenon echoes ancient mystical rites of death and rebirth, the alchemical process of transmutation, and the labor pains of awakening.
For as long as humanity has sought meaning, we have turned our gaze upward—to the heavens, the stars, the unknown. Yet, the greatest journey has never been outward, but inward. Across all great spiritual traditions, from the sacred scriptures of the East to the mystical revelations of the West, a singular truth echoes: our path is one of return, a spiral leading us back to Source.
The Return is a visual journey—an oracle deck that serves as both guide and mirror for the soul’s path. Each painting is a portal, an invitation to remember who we truly are beyond the veil of illusion. Through these images, we explore the universal stages of awakening, from descent into matter to the ascent toward unity.
The Descent and The Return
The human experience is one of forgetting and remembering. We are born into the physical realm, veiled in illusion, bound by time, karma, and the limitations of the material world. Yet, within us burns an unquenchable spark—the Higher Self, the Divine Presence—that longs for reunification with its source.
The first half of our journey is The Descent—the soul’s movement into density, experience, and separation from its origin. It is mirrored in myths such as the fall of Adam and Eve, the exile of the Prodigal Son, and the fragmentation of Osiris. This stage represents the soul’s immersion in the world of form, where it encounters suffering, duality, and the trials necessary for growth.
The second half is The Return—the conscious awakening of the soul, the path of self-mastery, and the steps back toward divine unity. This path is encoded in the lives of Jesus, Buddha, and other enlightened masters who have demonstrated the rites of initiation—baptism, transfiguration, crucifixion of the ego, resurrection, and ultimate ascension.
Each card in this deck corresponds to a step in this sacred journey. Drawing a card is more than an act of divination—it is a reflection of where you are in your unfolding, offering guidance, insight, and a deeper connection to the wisdom that already resides within you.
A Return to Essence
But what are we truly returning to? Beyond the grand spiritual journey, The Return is also a return to what is most essential in our everyday lives—the innocence we knew in childhood, the love we feel for those closest to us, the compassion and kindness we extend to others. It is a return to simplicity, to presence, to a way of being where the illusion of separation dissolves and only unity remains.
The paintings within this deck are more than images; they are invitations. Each one carries a frequency, a message, a key. They do not merely depict spiritual concepts but embody the lived experience of the soul—its trials, its dark nights, its luminous revelations. Whether used for daily insight, meditation, or deep spiritual exploration, The Return is a reminder:
The path has always been within.
This is The Return.